One week from today...

Written Friday 9/28/2011

One week from today I will be on my way to see Sim. I said way in the beginning I wouldn't count...and I haven't. Except for the next seven days, I'm OK with that. My summer has passed by very quickly thanks to all the travel that has kept me out of my house for over 80 nights since Sim left. We are both really looking forward to the time together. Of course I can't wait to see Sim, but I'm excited to spend time with Sim in his town, check out his apartment, meet Lenara and anyone else Sim wants to introduce me too. We'll also being going to Chernigov, see where Sim spent his first three months and meet his host family. I have been trying to teach myself some Russian, at least the basics...hello, goodbye, thank you, my name is, etc. Sim says he tells people not to use big words when they speak to him in Russian...I'll have to figure out a way to tell them to speak to me like I'm an infant...that should work for me!

Quick recap of my summer: lots of travel, a lot of time in NYC with my mom, dinner at some great places with friends, four triathlons, a few runs, an earthquake, and a hurricane. I am so grateful for all the help my mother in law gave me throughout all the travel, checking on things at home, picking me up at the train and always keeping me informed of what's going on during some of the few dinners we were able to enjoy together over the summer - including a birthday dinner at one of my favorite places, Chez Mike's. Thanks to all this busy-ness, it was a little easier to not notice the daily things that Sim was not there for. But little things keep creeping up every once in a while, phone calls have helped to make that a little better. Come to think of it, even when Sim is home little things come up that I want to share...I just have a wait a little longer.

Luckily Sim’s posts have been helping to make me feel like he is next to me, telling me about his day. I am really enjoying the posts, and lest anyone think I’m not a good wife, what I don’t say in comments I usually say in my phone calls to Sim. So much easier to chat on the phone! But, there are a few posts I’ve been meaning to comment on, a few thoughts I’ve had.

Here is one thing I've been thinking for a while...every time a read a post where I say to myself, “Sim would never have done that at home.” But, from what I know of Sim, he is willing to and going to do everything possible to be part of where he is living, even if it means challenging his comfort zone. He is opening himself up to allow the people, their culture and way of life to become a part of him. It is fun to read and I can't wait to try it out for myself in one week. I am so lucky to be married to such an amazing man!

At the orphanage - a post I’ve been meaning to comment on. I will preface this next section by saying, I am happy with the decisions I've made. It was one of those conversations that has to come up when thinking about getting married - children. I could have gone either way. I was never, and still am not, one of those people that the moment I see a baby I must hold the baby. I've actually been a little uncomfortable around babies, but then I figure it out and I'm fine. That is not to say I don't think children are a wonderful part of many people's lives and incredibly fulfilling. I can see how nice it might be to have some little person say...I love you mommy. But I can also see how much patience and time you need with children and I'm not sure I'd be good with that. When Sim said he didn't want children I was fine with making that a marriage wide decision. I could always see the other side of the coin, why someone would want children in their lives....Sim on the other hand seemed to never be able to even turn the coin a little. So when Sim posted about his experience at the orphanage, it really made me happy to read that maybe he was able to see the other side. That is all I've ever asked of Sim, not to change his mind, but to see the other side, empathize and understand what it means to be in someone else's shoes, like a parent.

Although a funny story about putting ourselves in a parents shoes...something we both said...if we were parents we wouldn't do it this way...a woman and like 4 kids walked in to a pizza place where we were having lunch, one of those pizza places that has a hundred types of pizza...she asks the kids which kind of pizza they want...they have plain, mushroom, pepperoni, etc. I don't remember how long it took before they all got done figuring out what they wanted, fighting over it and then changing their minds. Why? Why? Why give them all the choices? We both agreed if those were our kids we would have handled it a lot differently...ok there is plain pizza and pepperoni, which one do you want? No choices, which would lead to way too much craziness. We've seen a similar situation at the ice cream places...the parents start reading a list of 50 choices...crazy...you have vanilla, chocolate and the flavor of the week...that's it. I am amazed at myself at how much patience I have when teaching people computer stuff, but there are certain situations I've been in with children that I seem to lose patience quickly.

I'm glad to see him opening up in so many ways, part of a marriage is allowing each other to grow and change, not always be the same person you married. I guess two years of peace corps are a fast track for the both of us to open up to a lot of new things.

Cooking – Sim has always been good in the kitchen. Whenever I’ve been too tired or come home too late, as long as he has time to prepare he is willing to come up with something, usually following a recipe fairly closely. I, on the other hand, am a little more likely to NOT follow a recipe…and come up with something. Both of us are really appreciative of the cooking the other does, no matter what it tastes like, one of us didn’t have to cook. It has been fun to hear and read all the great things Sim is cooking. I have been jealous of being able to shop for fresh stuff on his way home every day, if he wanted, or accept fresh stuff from friends. What a treat. I am looking forward to being inspired by the fresh produce, and Sim. It’s always more fun to cook for someone else, and especially Sim who always lets me know how much he loves my cooking.

One week from today I will be with Sim...and I can't wait!